Have you missed the ongoing debate on employee equity and exercise windows? Many top people are talking about it. And there are lively public discussions on twitter. There is a pool of money for investors and founders in Silicon Valley that comes from employee ignorance. Great founders and investors don’t like it and are clear and fair with equity. Every time an employee wants to exercise their options but can’t for financial reasons, that pool gets larger.
Sorry to hear your story. Sadly, such cases are far too common. Agree that startup equity terms should be friendlier to employees.
As an aside, I came across Secfi that helps finance exercising options. Hope that helps others who run into this scenario. https://www.notboring.co/p/startup-stock-options-options-with